An interesting article this week in the Sunday Styles section of the New York Times, “What’s New at the PTA, Dad?” highlighted what is possibly a new trend: dads running their kids’ school PTAs. I’m pleased to see this happening. I wish more dads would take on what can definitely be considered “non-traditional” volunteer roles at their kids’ schools.
Juan Brea, a dad who runs the PTA at his kids’ NYC public school, says it’s like running a small business. The article points out that more dads are taking on leadership roles in PTAs, as the recession lingers and many are under-employed, have a zest to get involved and have valuable skills to contribute.
The year I served as auction co-chair at our elementary school, there was only one dad who stepped up to co-chair the event, the school’s biggest annual money-maker. Auction co-chair isn’t PTA president, but it is certainly close in terms of workload, school politics, high drama and logistical minefields.
We need more dads to run school organizations like PTAs and auctions. Why should dads be offered traditional male volunteer positions like the “finance committee” or the “real estate committee” and not mom-dominated roles like PTA president? Schools need dads to take on the roles typically seen as “mom” jobs. That would open up more of the male-dominated volunteer roles for moms. Beyond fairness in the assignment of volunteer jobs, balance is key in terms of gender, personalities and professional skills for school volunteering where the term “PTA” is synonymous for backbiting, nasty politics and “mama drama.” Maybe putting a dad in charge would be a nice change of pace. Or, would it be an extension of the world of work as many moms have experienced it? By that I mean sexist and unforgiving of a mom’s need for a flexible schedule? I shudder at the thought that the inflexibility of the boardroom might infiltrate the schoolroom!
Of course, it all depends on the particular dad who chooses to volunteer to run the PTA or other major school event. He must be confident, self-assured and friendly. He’s got to possess leadership qualities that bring various factions together and move the work agenda forward. That’s exactly what my auction co-chair did. He made my volunteer job a lot easier that year.
A second dad quoted in the NYT article recalls being yelled at by a mom who was unhappy with one of his decisions. This dressing down happened at his daughter’s tap dance performance. I doubt this dad was accustomed to being spoken to that way in public by anyone, let alone a mom at his kid’s school.
Obviously, not all dads who take on the herculean task of PTA president are nice guys. Sometimes, it can be a disaster, especially if the guy is a jerk. But, if more dads take on these roles, maybe schools will start to look to dads—and not just moms—as candidates for the most time-consuming volunteer roles that bring visibility and accolades along with the lowly task of stuffing envelopes.
Christina Simon is the co-author of Beyond The Brochure: An Insider’s Guide To Private Elementary Schools In Los Angeles. She also writes a blog for parents applying to private elementary schools in L.A. Christina’s work has been published on Salon.com, BlogHer, Mamapedia, The Mother Company and numerous other sites. She holds a B.A. from U.C. Berkeley and an M.A. from UCLA. www.beyondthebrochurela.com
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Great post, Christina! I wish we had more dads involved at our school’s PTA too. My husband was asked to be in charge of the food committee for our school’s fun run, so he’s been going to fun run committee meetings (held during the day) and he is the only guy in the room. He gets lots of good-natured jokes from the moms in the room, and he takes it all in stride. But I know he would love to see more dads (especially the ones who work from home and are available during the day) take on leadership roles in the school organizations.
It’s not surprising to see more dads in the PTA, as there are more who have taken the role of at-home parent. I welcome the movement; I just would hate to see them *replace* women in roles of leadership, as PTA leadership is one of the few things a stay-at-home mom can list on her resume when she’s ready to re-enter the workforce. Maybe some day, we’ll live in a world when it’s unremarkable for a woman to be a CEO and a man to be a PTA leader.
I love it that dads are invloved. I think kids who see their dads really involved at school will benefit greatly. This is just another way for dads to build a solid relationship with their kids.
I think it’s awesome when dads are involved. It’s such a great example to set for the kids and it’s so good for the fathers to have a chance to have a more connected role at the school. We have a few dads who are always around at our preschool and they have been a great source of input and bring new skills to the table. In my multiples club we have one dad (a father of 2-year old triplets no less) who volunteers his time to help run our website and design graphics. We’d be lost without him!
- Great post, Christina!
Great Post! We have a Father of a 1st grader in our group that attends every single event from fundraiser to fieldtrip! It’s great to see more Dads getting in on all the action. It’s great for the kids to see both parents participating. I know my son is always extra excited when he gets to show his Dad off!!!
Great post. Did you see the episode of Suburgatory where the dad takes on the PTA? It’s a humor show and of course satirical but I actually thought it did a good job of illuminating why we need all sorts of people on the PTA. Including dads!
LOVED that episode!
I don’t know why this is being hailed as a “new” thing. When I was in ELementary school (yes we rode dinosaurs) We had a very active Dad’s Club and what is now known as the PTA was called the Mom’s Club. Each club was in charge of specific events and collaborated on a bunch as well. When did it change? When my kids were in school we had a bunch of dad’s active in the PTA (never in the role as President tho…hmmmmm).
Would love to see more dads involved it really should be both !
I LOVE that dads are getting involved. In our own household, I don’t subscribe to the “women should be the mothers etc etc” stereotypes. I LOVE when my husband is involved with whatever our children are doing…that’s how it should be. : )
Speaking as a mom who’s always worked fulltime outside the home and been challenged to get very involved in school matters that didn’t directly impact my kids (like homework), I think schools whose PTAs are flexible about how they schedule their functions and meetings–outside of traditional school hours, for starters–may be more likely to attract dads, and they might get a different mix of moms, too. In any case, I think this is a positive development.
We are lucky to have so many active Dad’s at our children’s school. I think it is so important that both parents play an active role in their children’s education.