I never thought it would happen. I never thought I would be the kind of mom who said “okay,” when her kids asked for a piece of candy. I never thought I would say, “sure,” when they reached for more French fries. And I never, ever thought I would be the mom who said, “yes, let’s buy that ice cream cake covered in artificial blue frosting.”
But it happened. I don’t know if I’m tired or if I don’t care as much, but I’m no longer the food police. Not all that long ago, I regularly pureed organic vegetables and served my boys grassfed beef or free range chicken. Last night, I made them grilled cheese for dinner and didn’t even bother to heat up the carrots, green beans, and corn they refused to eat the night before.
It wasn’t just that there were no vegetables at dinner. I made them a smoothie and put in (gasp) strawberry milk powder. I don’t even know how it ended up in my house, but we have a giant container of it. It’s sugar with artificial flavors and colorings. It’s so bad and without thinking I put it in their smoothie. Oh my, did they love it. And they loved me for it.
I don’t think that affection is my only motivation for completely failing in the food department, but when I think about my older son’s birthday, I wonder. When he first asked me for a store bought ice cream cake I said no, that I always make his birthday cake. But he kept asking and shot down my suggestion to make it myself. I thought about what I had to do that week and I barely had time to make the food for his birthday party, let alone make a cake I had never made before. So I caved.
Later when the parents were trying to scrub blue dye from the partygoers’ faces, I realized that I had hit foodie rock bottom. What am I teaching them? That it’s okay to eat junk food if you really, really want it or if mom’s too tired to say no. I believe in everything in moderation, but lately it hasn’t been in moderation.
Yep, I have a new New Year’s Resolution. Only real food from now on. I’ll keep you posted.